If there’s one classic Adam Herzog line, this might be it -- “Don’t be a fucking pussy.”
It’s applicable to almost every situation in which Adam finds himself, and the Raquette put-in is no exception.
“But we can drive shuttle and be back in ten minutes,” Alan said. Alan is built like a malnourished sparrow, and was wearing brand new skate shoes instead of river booties.
“Don’t be a fucking pussy. It’s faster to hike.”
Visiting the sweet eddy between the tubs.
I had heard stories of Herzog hiking his own shuttle for 5 laps of the Raquette in a day. Most guys use cars to shuttle for 2 or 3 laps and drink beer between them. Adam, on the other hand, is not a fucking pussy.
He’s also 6’4” and hard to argue with, so five of us found ourselves putting on (before the dam ramped up, even) with no car at the bottom, and vague descriptions of a 20 minute uphill hike back to the put-in.
Thanks to Pat for this shot from last year -- the Colton boof is as good as ever, but the sneak lead-in is shallower.
We ran Colton, and realized that the water was not, in fact, even on. After ten minutes of scouting the Cathedral line, it looked scary enough that someone must have opened the dam, so we got back in our boats and headed downstream.
The Narrows comes after a few class III-IV ledges. This is one of the only good boofs on the river, and almost everyone skies it high on the right. Adam was lined up in an eddy on the left, peering over two stacked holes.
On a cursory boatscout, he dropped in for a minute of violent surfing. Someone on shore taking pictures yelled at me to go help him, but they didn’t know that Herzog had pussyhood on the line. That guy wasn’t coming out of his boat.
Morgan Boyles sliding Colton.
We routed through the Tubs and Particle Accelerator, a shallow slide that always seems to be dislocating someone’s shoulder. The hike was surprisingly pleasant. When I got to the top, I expected to see Adam yawning languorously and finishing a crossword puzzle. Instead, he was nowhere in sight.
“Maybe he put on for a solo run,” I thought. Ten minutes later, Alan stumbled in with his skate shoes scuffed beyond recognition.
“Adam’s still back there messing with his backpack system,” he said. “I’m not gonna hike again. Let’s drive shuttle before he gets back.”
So, Alan and I drove shuttle and razzed Adam mercilessly when we returned: “We could’ve gotten another lap already,” we said – turning another of Adam well-worn phrases against him.
Toby Bucsescu about to break his brand new boat.
Two runs later – one hiked and one using our shuttle cars, Adam got his revenge by taking a slicey playboat on his last laps. The “Session +” was made in 2001 and has less volume than most Camelbacks. The plastic is about that stiff, too.
But, true to form, Adam styled his run, and even hiked it back up to paddle the last three rapids again. While ostensibly setting safety for Adam in his playboat, I took a karmic surf in the middle Tub.
It may look like Adam's out of his boat. He's not -- the boat is just too small to see.
After 4 and a half runs and that many hikes, Morgan and I got in the car for the long drive home. I was hungry, tired, and already feeling sore. Adam, Alan and Toby, on the other hand, were gearing up to head back to Canada to paddle the Rouge.
As we pulled out of the parking lot, Adam said, “We could’ve had one more run if you guys didn’t drive shuttle.”
“Maybe next time you won’t be so slow,” I said, and cracked a beer.
Other than Pat's shot of Colton, all photos Tripp Burwell.